I Can Sing and Make Music, but Always Give Thanks?

by Patti Brown
November 25, 2003

With Thanksgiving just a few days away, I have been thinking a lot about what it means to be thankful. We can get awfully cliche this time of year.

There is nothing wrong, of course, with being thankful for our abundance. I know that if you are reading this, then you have been blessed with an abundance that so many will never know... at the very least you have been blessed with an education that has taught you to read, and resources to have access to e-mail.

You will find reminders to be thankful for what you have in every card and gift shop, on the TV, even around the dinner table. It is good to be thankful for our obvious blessings. But I don't think you need another nudge in that direction.

Consider this:

"Sing and make music in your heart to the Lord, always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ." (Ephesians 5:19-20 niv)

Do you think Paul was serious to always be thankful for everything? I mean EVERYTHING? What would that look like? Should I be thankful for my headaches? Thankful when my child is injured? Thankful that my friend is suffering through a divorce? What does it mean to always be thankful for everything?

I can not begin to consider every possible scenario, and I know that there are those that I would be horrified to consider. The trials that some go through on this earth are beyond my comprehension. Yet I come back to: "be thankful for everything."

When I first began to consider this scripture, I tried something new in my prayer time. I began to give thanks for the bad things that had happened in my day. I didn't just say, for example, "And thank you for the demeaning way in which x treated me at work today." I would pray: "Thank you for the reminder I had today of who sets my value. I am so glad that you are my judge, and that I work for you, not for any man. Please help me to love x the way you love him." Sometimes I might have to pray, "Please show me what there is to be thankful for in this situation, or about this person."

At first this was hard, but over time it became easier and easier. And remarkably, the trials seemed a little less, well, trying. It was as if a sharp edge was being been rubbed off them... not that they necessarily went away (although some did... for example, I have worked for my family (as mama and wife) for over seven years now... the days of demeaning co-workers are far behind me). But I didn't feel as angry. A tenderness was growing in me.

Then I ran into a personal loss that was too big. How could I thank God for the death of our second child when I was 13 weeks pregnant? After the first shock of grief wore off, I was confronted with this problem. I knew that somehow, somehow, God was calling me to have a thankful heart in the midst of this tragedy, but how?!

It took a long time for the sharp edge of THAT pain to become dulled enough to even consider allowing God to show me how to be thankful in this loss. But eventually he led me there (and I can assure you that it was with sobs and much resistance). I could write a lot about that time, and what God has done in my heart as a result.

Here are a few of the things for which I am thankful:
- that our baby was born at home, and that I was able to see him
- that his life was not in vain, for his death was the push that dropped me to my knees so hard that my life was turned toward God in a new way forever
- that I know in a deeply personal way what it means to be comforted in the arms of Jesus
- that I can minister to and love women who experience miscarriage in a much more real way

I say this a lot, and I'll say it again: I am not talking about false happiness, putting on a happy smile, and making bad things look good. I am talking about true thankfulness in the midst of tragedy. I'm talking about real life, real pain, and really being thankful.

So, when people go around the table and count their blessings this year, are you going to pipe up with one of your worst experiences of the year? Not likely! :-) But in your quiet time (or your noisy time, as my time with God often is), take some moments to have it out with God. Pick something that is heavy on you right now, a burden that you feel you can't bear, and ask God to show what to be thankful for in that situation.

Watch and see what he will do!!

Praying that you will find the abundance hidden in your sorrows....